Sunday, July 21, 2013

Growing Old

We all grow old, but do we ever stop to think about it. Going about our busy life, day in and out, that we hardly have time to go to the bathroom, let alone think about our own mortality. I guess my dad's near heart attack and subsequent quadruple bypass surgery has me thinking about this more than I should.

All of this has starting me thinking about my own life...again. Over the years, I've often wonder what it would have been like to find my birth parents. Truth is, I've been thinking about it more and more. Is it because I have always felt different or because I am looking at a future of losing my adoptive parents and being alone?

The older I get, the more it scares me to think that I will someday be alone. I'm surrounded by people all day long, but still go home to a relatively quiet house. No children to care for; just a husband who is pretty much self-sufficient. He loves me, but he doesn't need much help. He's older than I...but I love him. He's my family.

I have a brother, but miles separate us. Two years older, with a wife and extended family, he's busy with his own life. We talk...maybe twice a year. He's been shaken to the core though with dad's near death. Yes, it was a near death. My mom shared that bit of news with me a few days ago. I'm still reeling from it. But Jeff has been there every day, being with my dad and mom. I wish I was there but they've asked me not to...at least I've spoken with mom every day since she told me what happened. Jeff though...he's been there 24/7.

My friends have been helping me through this time, as well as my husband. I guess I've been living a busy life too, letting time slip by without my thought. Whoever coined the phrase "Ignorance is bliss" really should have come up with a better wake up call.

Wishing you moments of to remember not to let life slip by,
 

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3 comments :

  1. We all take life & loved ones for granted. I'm praying for your dad. I hope you somehow find time to spend with your family.

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  2. At least you are thinking about it and writing about it. Several years ago I was single and realized that as an only child, I would also be alone some day. That started me on a journey to get in touch with my biological father and now I have a relationship with him and his family. That peace led me to my other half and he has a wonderful family I am now part of. I wish you and your family the best.

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  3. I totally understand....My baby will be going off to college and I am here with my husband and an empty nest. I've known hubby for 30 years. It is a strange feeling. Looking for new things to come.

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